When my grand daughter, Jenna Patch, was four, I taught her to say “thank you” when given anything, ranging from a simple compliment to a gift. I would often be standing by her in the company of grownups  and something meriting her saying “thank you”  would crop up and I would remind her, “What do you say?” and she would automatically reply, “Thank you.”  

Now she is a grown up 8, and quite self contained, but old habits die hard.. Recently, I asked her how it was going, in the form of the colloquial “Well, what do you say?”  She smiled up at me, and replied, “Thank you.” 

It took very little time for me to explain to this sharp child that “what do you say?” also means, “How is it going?”. with no “thank you”  required. She smiled brightly and immediately understood both concepts. 

Double meanings have permeated the ghetto, like “snitch.” It was always a doubtful word, meaning someone who tattled on another person who did “wrong.”  Now it has a darker meaning. Anyone who tattles on anyone, right or wrong, is a snitch. `          

According to the  CBS TV 60 Minutes piece on gangsta rap, it is against the code to “snitch” on anyone, even if you know they are planning to shoot up a school. or have witnessed a murder. Try to explain that to Jenna Patch. 

In the same CBS piece, rapper Cam’ron, laughed derisively, when asked if he was worried that the current scandal threatens his livelihood. He said that  record company Board Members with the power to change things overnight, would continue looking  the other way and take the money.  

Despite Cam’ron,  I hear that more influential people are applying pressure on the record company Boards  to moderate the lyrics of their products.  

Depending on the Reverends Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton to straighten things out isn’t going to do it. I suggest a whole new approach.  

Instead of wringing our wrists and “ain’t it awfulling,” deflect gangsta  anger with  humor and style.  

Kids in The Hood have to be exposed to broader culture. Maybe, we need to adapt the classics to their life style, expand their minds. 

Imagine Poe’s The Raven” in rap form.

Suddenly, I heard a tapping

as of someone gently rapping,

rapping  on my chamber do’

It was a bitch without a stitch, a nappy headed ho.

                                                       Edgar Allen Po

Well…maybe I missed the mark on that one.

 

In the drug-dazed 60’s, there was a group of mischief makers called “The Merry "Pranksters,” who toured the country in a psychedelically painted bus. They’re an historic symbol of the rock and roll era. 

Spinning off the Pranksters ,I have in mind a high-end limo load of gangsta types who will tour the country, bedecked with bling, and playing the gangsta roles. 

Underwritten by large corporations, and local rap radio stations, they would  tour the “hoods”  awarding  scholarships for deserving young blacks. They would put it over in a non-preachy way,  Improv Theater at its finest  Done right, they would arouse great response that, hopefully, would grow exponentially, as they make their way across the country in their glistening gangsta limo. 

I can see them putting on rap shows in the streets and attracting massive local TV coverage, with clever  creative original rap lyrics, an act that  ultimately would ripple to major national TV shows, Oprah, Ellen….Regis…Time is ripe for it.  

A major part of their message is the danger of drugs. Has anyone told druggies that when they buy drugs they help kill Americans, even their homies overseas? That should be their campaign, not the  ineffective moralizing.  If we succeed in that, we would go a long way toward cutting off the money that fuels terrorists in their war against us.  

Recent studies show that 12 years is the age when a child begins to learn from his or her peers. Up till then they learn from their parents. I call it The 12+  Rule  Then, a child should peel off to after-hours school recreation facilities with his or her peers, under strong supervision by adults.  

Russell  Simmons, the Rap mogul, advocates the elimination of  “bitches, hos and  n-words” from song lyrics when played on the air. Trained right, black kids would personally censor those words as irrelevant. 

 The Rutgers  basketball team women  said, when interviewed, that they knew Imus’s words did not apply to them, so no harm, no foul. His apology was accepted partly because of this. 

The most blatant example of censorship I ever experienced was not about the printed or spoken word. It was at the New York Metropolitan Museum of Art. 

When I was 10, my mother took me to New York and included in our trip a tour of the Museum. Most of it  was over my head, but I enjoyed it because she was so thrilled with the art that her joy permeated me.  She loved painting up to the final year she lived. She died in her 100^th year, I think, because she lost her sight that year and could no longer see to paint.  

On the Museum trip, I especially remember the Greek and Roman statuary, vaguely noticing that these splendidly muscled men had no penises. Or the Latin, Penii. The Greek is Peniopoulous. At that age, I paid only passing attention to their handicap or extreme E.D. as it has come to be known in television ads. I did, however, sense that something was amiss.  

If anything, I assumed the Greek and Roman men were deflowered over the centuries by erosion. My brother, a New Yorker, told me the true cause. 

After years of faithful service  to the Museum, a proper lady in charge of  the Roman and Greek statuary died. It was not until attendants cleaned out her desk at the entrance to the display that they discovered a hammer lying among dozens of marble penises in one of the drawers. 

She had taken it upon herself to take the hammer and lop off their offending members, in deference to the tens of  thousands of impressionable youngsters who trooped through the Museum each year. They were re-attached. 

The English language contains over 500,000 words, Still, we can’t quite get a hold on it.….

Fer instance: A good ‘ol boy was tooling down a Texas back road when he seen this sign in front of a bar.

Happy Hour Special.  

Lobster Tail and Beer.

Lord A’ mighty!” he exclaims to himself. ”My three favorite thangs,” 

A social reminder for Southern Californians.

May 6^th,  Sunday next,  the San Diego Press Club, San Elijo Hills, and San Diego State University combine to salute the cream of radio jocks of the 50’s 60’s and 70’s. They call it  “Blasts from the Past.” It’s an outdoor event at San Diego State. 

17 distinguished  chefs will serve food and wine to the fortunates who attend the party that runs from 2pm till 5:30pm. The 4 and 5 star food, and prize winning wine alone are worth it. We jocks promise to be paralyzingly funny.  

Charlie and Harrigan, Joe Bauer of Hudson and Bauer, Ernie Myers, Perry Allen, Mel Hal, and Don Howard: San Diego will ever forget them..  

It is a fallacy to say that the Iraqi war  generated all of the anger and filth you hear on the radio these days.  Not true.  We “Blast” jocks spread joy during the Viet Nam era, a period much worse than today. Many more were killed, an entire  decade in which the country was in the throes of  a  national nervous breakdown. Yet, the men to be honored Sunday never took the easy way out by working dirty, or spewing the filth often heard today by many of the new shock jocks. This is an opportunity to come thank these “Blasts from the Past” if you enjoyed them.    

I hear that many major contemporaries will be there, including KOGO’s Roger Hedgecock, back from Washington DC after a triumphant “Hold Their Feet to the  Fire” campaign with 30 other prominent talk show hosts from across the country. 

It will be a memorable experience for you. Tickets ($40.00)  Order direct with Visa or MasterCard www.sdpressclub.org 

They are $50.00 at the gate. Questions: Call Terry Williams, San Diego Press Club Manager, at 619-231-4340. Hurry! It’ll be a sell-out 

Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.

                                                                                         Mike Glickenhaus.
                                                                                         President /CEO
                                                                                         Finest City Broadcasting